High-Performance Mindset Coach: 5 Things I Wish I Knew at 20 | Elliot Roe

00:00:03: There's going to be a genuine passion and obsession, And then the second side of this is being public enough that people accept you're best.

00:00:11: I believe there are lots of skills in one industry or transferable into other industries.

00:00:16: In honesty when they become top-of-the world They leave a lot behind A lot of judgement and discomfort That comes with

00:00:41: it.

00:00:49: Hi five guys, this is Joelle and you know I learned one thing.

00:00:52: Successes the product of three different things talent training and mindset.

00:00:57: And interestingly enough, as far top ten in the world.

00:01:26: So quite a high thing Elliot is aiming for, and obviously I'm really curious about five things he wished he had known when he was twenty.

00:01:33: so Elliot it's great to have you on this show!

00:01:37: Thankyou very much for having me on, I'm excited about your conversation.

00:01:41: Yes interestingly enough i just learned that you're from England but do live in the United States in Southlake City.

00:01:47: What what a great journey so far already I guess.

00:01:49: Yeah quite Las Vegas to Salt Lake City, so it's a different environment.

00:01:58: Okay I guess we're going to understand your job in more detail soon.

00:02:02: but before we start i'm curious about your age.

00:02:05: if you feeling well?

00:02:06: To tell me because i am always interested from where do you look back into the twenties

00:02:10: So im forty four years old

00:02:12: Forty-four.

00:02:13: okay that is great.

00:02:13: now More than twenty years of revives let us just kick right in what was first.

00:02:18: thing would have loved to know with twenty.

00:02:20: Okay, so the first one and this ones pretty business related for me.

00:02:23: But it's that all of the value That you generate from your work in terms of wealth financial success I believe comes From being The top-one percent Of any industry And i think there are a lot people who don't really fully understand.

00:02:41: The results are exponentially different.

00:02:52: So if you think about the industries I work within, so i worked with traders and professional athletes, poker players, professional gamblers or CEOs of companies... And then you look at the distribution of financial success in those areas.

00:03:08: there were astronomical differences between the person who is number one in the world Then number three making a lot less money Number ten in the world, a lot less money.

00:03:21: and you know top hundred.

00:03:22: In some industries even some sports might be struggling to survive.

00:03:26: Well

00:03:27: everything is just so weighted towards those who are exceptional at what they do And I mean Even if you take it to random industries If you think about The best wedding cake baker in the World How much does that wedding cake cost?

00:03:43: You Know when the Prince of Dubai gets a wedding cake, you know it's likely tens of thousands dollars because they are going to the baker who will make the best cake on the planet.

00:03:55: And then you have a normal baker making her wedding cake for a wedding and its three hundred dollars!

00:04:01: It is not that different again...it s same as a bottle of wine The value of a bottle or wine....the very top wines are astronomically more expensive.

00:04:12: So what sort of?

00:04:13: going back to my twenties, I would explain to myself that this becoming elite in an industry and absolutely niching.

00:04:22: And being the person people go too is where all other rewards come from?

00:04:27: And i think there's a lot of people have self sabotage.

00:04:30: were they're willing to put it on eighty percent effort and then they hold themselves back from giving one hundred percent because they can always tell themselves, if I had tried it would have been successful.

00:04:43: So this sort of holding back enough to protect their ego.

00:04:47: and If you can get past that actually i'm going To really try...I am Really gonna give It my all!

00:04:52: I Am really Gonna face the discomfort Of..If I fail?

00:04:55: I really failed Because I gave it My All And it didn't work out Then You're in a situation where we Can learn from That failure correctly Because you've given it your all and found Out and got data to then Work From.

00:05:07: But I would say the majority of people really struggle to get... To get that level and through the comfort zone, the plateau of sort-of doing okay.

00:05:19: Now as asking myself when you just talked about this wedding thing?

00:05:22: The wedding cake what does make someone best in the world like?

00:05:27: What's the metrics your looking at the KPIs ?

00:05:30: So i think there is a combination or passion.

00:05:34: so you ideally need to be finding something that is extraordinarily well suited your personality.

00:05:43: So, so you need to feel congruent To the people who are purchasing from you and it needs to be real.

00:05:49: It needs to true The world's best.

00:05:54: not an expert on wedding cakes but let us pretend they're going to absolutely love baking cakes.

00:06:02: They can be obsessed with the technical skills around baking, around moistness of cake.

00:06:11: Around flavorings of sugar or types of sugar that are being used.

00:06:15: There's going to be a genuine passion and obsession.

00:06:17: So so thats one piece.

00:06:19: And then second side is this Being public enough That people accept you're best This another part Of sort of being paid for this Or having financial success.

00:06:31: You can't hide your skill set.

00:06:35: You have to be willing to the open, you have been willing to share with world because if it's not visible...you're going to rewarded for that!

00:06:42: You need known-to-be best and people sharing they believe are the best.

00:06:48: Because another part of being paid is like sponsorship in sports.

00:06:52: sometimes maybe crass but loudest athletes often get paid a lot more sponsorship money.

00:06:58: Conor McGregor was extraordinarily loud his career And that allowed him to, I think they say he's a billionaire now.

00:07:05: Other UFC fighters are not billionaires and part of that is around sort of the excessive confidence in show.

00:07:12: so i'm not saying everyone has to be this excessive extraverted character but certainly you have to be public.

00:07:18: You Have To Be willing to share willing to put yourself out there and Say I believe i'm The Best In My Industry And Others May Not Believe You're the best.

00:07:27: And that's fine, but I think you personally have to believe that your putting yourself out there... ...that you are a good fit for the industry and it is great personality for like living sort of your message or your living life as part-of-you.

00:07:43: when people sense that its' part of you they willing invest in different way They can get a different level value

00:07:52: Interesting.

00:07:53: Do see any patterns or aspects that all these people do have in common?

00:08:01: I think it really is, they're living the life they were supposed to live.

00:08:05: It's very rare for me to reach someone who truly number one and top ten of world in an industry... ...and then doesn't feel like a fit more than times!

00:08:22: You know, there are a lot of people in the world.

00:08:27: It's very hard to be top ten if you're not living your authentic truth but your competitors are.

00:08:33: it is very hard To brute force that level Of success.

00:08:38: and y'know they might cut back The number of industries That you can try If he wants to reach that Level.

00:08:44: But I just think its true.

00:08:45: Y'know i was never gonna Be an NBA basketball player on five foot ten.

00:08:50: You know, there might be someone on the bell curve.

00:08:54: There might an individual who's short and a good basketball player but the truth is that best basketball player in world Is highly unlikely to be five for ten.

00:09:04: And I think it's case of being realistic about your strengths.

00:09:07: Be realistic about natural abysses.

00:09:09: What you were born with what you've learned over life Have look at where would fit best?

00:09:21: Would you say that, I mean there's always this discussion.

00:09:24: That each person is able to do one thing extraordinarily good like your personal superpower?

00:09:30: Is it also what you witnessed in people that every human has a super

00:09:33: power?".

00:09:34: Um...I would like believe so but i think mostly my the-the people who are coming to me are typically already exceptional.

00:09:44: So, I'm in a strange world where almost everyone I meet and I speak to certainly within my professional work has already had very high level of success.

00:09:55: You know...I believe everything's on the bell curve!

00:10:00: And i would like to think that everybody have super power but just with numbers it is unlikely every one could become best in.

00:10:06: well you can be good at something..but the maths doesn't work.

00:10:12: So it's kind of a bias you're living in because you only see the top-of-the-pyramids, okay?

00:10:17: Yeah.

00:10:17: I think...I would say that people who are reaching out to me have extraordinary capabilities and It is highly likely they can reach this level but i don't know if thats true for every single person.

00:10:30: ever as again, im certainly not going be best basketball player But maybe everyone has something!

00:10:39: that the world is fair and everything's evenly distributed.

00:10:41: And everyone has the same opportunity, and there is something you can find.

00:10:46: but I think every one has a passion they can find.

00:10:49: As good as it gets at... Everyone have a passion that they can live a good life in and they can certainly reach high levels of an industry But obviously then only ever be number-one.

00:11:04: But interestingly enough, I think there's some kind of magnetism to these people.

00:11:07: Because when i was talking to Fedor which is also a client of yours, Fedor Holtz one the most successful poker players in the world... ...I can remember I was chatting with his friend who knows him quite a bit and he says you know.. ..i've witnessed this!

00:11:20: People are always interested in exchanging with someone who is among the best in what he or she is doing So that actually has some sort of magneticism just for pure role.

00:11:32: Yeah, I mean it's exciting for people.

00:11:35: It's a good story you know?

00:11:36: I met the number one poker player in the world and hey A stock trader is gonna tell his friends about that.

00:11:43: You know there was a magnetism to someone being the best And i believe a lot of the skills with being The Best In One Industry are transferable To Other Industries.

00:11:53: So There Is Sort Of Effort That You Need To Put Into Passion That Needs To Be There.

00:11:58: The Lessons That You need To Learn Along The Way The Challenges You Face you know, facing your own insecurities.

00:12:04: Facing the judgment of others.

00:12:07: everyone in every industry when they reach the top has had to face these same challenges and we've got interesting stories to tell

00:12:15: now.

00:12:15: You said that becoming the top one percent In an industry or a sport whatever it is It's kind of an outlier business Or actually the maximum being an outlayer.

00:12:27: What does this mean?

00:12:28: Because obviously you could also have great life Not being part of the top one percent.

00:12:33: So what exactly made this point, The first on your list?

00:12:37: I think it's due to the conversations i'm having all day long so It is very top-of-mind for me When I think about.

00:12:46: you know What are the lessons that people would like To learn and This Is the lesson That often People Are reaching out to Me specifically For So...I Think Im Biased Towards This sort Of Reach Because again, this is what I've seen to be true over and over again.

00:13:02: And i think it's so missed by many members of the public This idea that you know like...I can be successful but I don't need to really give a hundred percent.

00:13:14: All this piece where some most people are aware That they're not giving one hundred percent They already go protecting To some extent and understanding that facing the fear of true failure is where great success comes from.

00:13:36: What kind of failure rates do you witness?

00:13:38: So if someone tries to become the top one percent in the world or the top guy in this industry, whatever his maximum standard it how many people trying so are failing?

00:13:50: I've had quite insane success with clients.

00:13:53: i have taken a number And a much larger number to top ten in the world.

00:14:00: I think there are obviously people who don't make it that level, but they're still on the journey and so its hard say someone's failed if their'e still one of the journey for that place.

00:14:11: Athletes age out... There were some athletes i've worked with who didn't reach that Top five in the World So They never quite made big money.

00:14:24: If you're on this journey of iteration and learning from your mistakes, then pushing forward.

00:14:30: You certainly have a very outsized opportunity to become number one in the world probably much if he really give it the full effort into mind sets in the right place?

00:14:43: And do you have the right people around?

00:14:44: here is surprising level that you can reach an industry.

00:14:49: I think there's also saying at go something like If you aim for the moon, you land upon the stars.

00:14:55: Something like this right?

00:14:56: You may not reach to the Moon but...

00:14:58: Aim for the stars and hit them in!

00:15:00: Yeah

00:15:01: see that's it.

00:15:01: thank you Thank you yeah.

00:15:04: But anyway how much of this has to do with risk taking by the way The ability to take risks And the willingness To Take Risks.

00:15:11: I think without being willing to take risk your gonna be stuck In Your Life.

00:15:15: My thing everything is about Taking These Huge Risks And Accepting That it's actually a bigger risk to not take that risk.

00:15:24: So, in the framework of what you view risk as?

00:15:28: And is also related resources like... Is more probable someone who rich or has big sponsors becomes this successful or dismantled from resources?

00:15:40: I would say its possibly harder To become absolute best if have extreme resource.

00:15:48: I think it'd be opposite.

00:15:49: So, i've worked with a number of people over the years who have been left family money so large amounts of money and It is extraordinarily hard for them to be motivated And it's extraordinary hard For them To get respect from the rest Of society no matter The level of success they Have.

00:16:08: So when it comes to being elite in an industry Extreme Amounts of unearned resources oftentimes can actually be create more of a resistance rather than in a turbo boost.

00:16:23: I highly recommend the book called Die with Zero by Bill Perkins regarding spending your money before you die and again, from what i've seen leaving sort-of huge legacy sums to your children... ...I don't believe creates particularly happy people.

00:16:41: Yeah!

00:16:41: I guess so too.

00:16:42: it rather creates sad people.

00:16:47: Now, we actually danced around the big pink elephant in the room.

00:16:50: What are you doing to make these people so extraordinary?

00:16:53: So when they come to you and there like that top twenty or top fifty in their interest tree and you made them the top three or even top one what's your

00:16:59: secret?".

00:17:01: So my work is hypnotherapy... It's not magic it's not like hypnosis as he would see on stage shows or TV.

00:17:08: its a guided meditation That will bring up memories from past that we can work through, that explain fear of failure.

00:17:17: Fear of success motivation issues financial issues and I found the oftentimes is these sort of These subtle resistances That are holding someone back.

00:17:30: then if you can unlock?

00:17:32: But at level of performance If he could get rid of the resistance if The person cannot allow themselves to give a hundred percent because that internal resistance has gone They can outperform competitors who haven't done that work.

00:17:48: So it's like a very small edge, That is very valuable if we're talking about points of the second in a race or A couple of decisions and a poker tournament.

00:17:59: I mean you already gave some kind of sneak preview what people are, you know what holds them back?

00:18:04: Maybe fear or maybe something in your family history.

00:18:07: Or whatsoever.

00:18:07: and You also mentioned at the very beginning that often People give only eighty percent.

00:18:11: so they have a reason to protect their ego as you said if They do not make it.

00:18:16: but which is say What other top three Top five aspects That keep people from being successful or allowing themselves To become successful?

00:18:25: I think The first one that becomes up In So many sessions is a fear of loneliness and judgment from their peers.

00:18:32: And they're family, so oftentimes we've been brought up in family households where rich people are bad.

00:18:55: If you're successful, You become a bad person and you be judged.

00:19:03: And you become isolated from your friends and family.

00:19:07: in honesty when people become top of the world In different industry they leave A lot Of People Behind.

00:19:14: There is a Lot of Judgment and there Is discomfort that comes with this.

00:19:19: so it's a fear to overcome but It's also a rational Fear like some people are going To Be really upset That you came From The same Street and you're dramatically more successful than them, because it's going to hit all of their insecurities.

00:19:34: So some of your friends aren't gonna want to see you ten times more successful.

00:19:38: then they are.

00:19:39: And its'gonna create splits.

00:19:41: It's ganna create discomfort.

00:19:43: A lot high performers.

00:19:45: They are looking for community CEOs Of companies Top rated athletes and such Because Its so hard For Them To Keep The Community That They Grow Up With.

00:19:57: So it's a fear, but also its irrational fear.

00:20:00: It is one of the challenges that top performers and successful people have to overcome.

00:20:05: so I think thats clearly The Top Issue That i see coming up all the time The issue with the ego protection.

00:20:13: As Im doing sessions With Clients Often the Ego Protection Comes From.

00:20:18: They Were The Clever Kid At School And Everyone Said How Clever they were And They Started To Define Themselves.

00:20:25: You know, I'm the clever kid.

00:20:29: They then stopped trying studying for exams because if they study and they fail there no longer The Clever Kid but If they don't study And they fail There's a clever kid who chose not to try right?

00:20:46: So it's a wonderful ego protection mechanism Because then you're never truly challenging yourself and you never lose the label and you can still tell yourself i'm gifted I'm just choosing not to try and that gifted in choosing, not-to-try often for those people through life.

00:21:01: And they have it at different levels.

00:21:04: You know you had tried some extent high level of success.

00:21:09: but a lot naturally gifted people see as the hold up what we have.

00:21:14: It's quite self sabotage right?

00:21:17: Nearly all work i do is self sabotaged.

00:21:20: so helping my client get out from themselves And then we see what their potential is whilst they're no longer getting her in the wrong way.

00:21:28: I sort of describe it as, It's a bit like they are driving while still with their foot on the brake.

00:21:34: and What happens if We can help them take that off the break?

00:21:38: And i'm wondering you also mentioned The aspect of publicity That actually came to my mind.

00:21:43: You could be most talented person In the room If your not able To sell yourself or show-off Then its hard to become best in world Because u need resources the chances kind of, is this often a problem that someone is talented but not willing to be public or talk about

00:22:08: it?

00:22:25: You go out there and you say, hey I'm the best podcaster in world.

00:22:29: There are gonna be people who say no your not because of this ,this .

00:22:33: And then have information that can adjust to so they become even better So that criticism from being public facing actually gives an opportunity for fine-tuned.

00:22:47: but if you're on bed room by yourself with ten people listening there's a lot of data that you're missing, if you have twenty million people giving your feedback.

00:23:02: So I think they are hidden talented people but their missing feed back would allow them to become truly exceptional.

00:23:12: That is interesting!

00:23:13: People tend tell him and her better than this guy or girl...

00:23:19: But even that?

00:23:21: Even that really important

00:23:23: information?!

00:23:24: So if you, again... If it was you and on Twitter suddenly everyone's giving the same three names as being better than you.

00:23:34: That's extraordinary data!

00:23:38: You then go and listen to all of their podcasts And you research why so many people are saying that they're better than your

00:23:45: true?

00:23:46: Then you can upgrade yourself.

00:23:48: even this very base kickback judgment might create some value or hold some values so you can make that change.

00:23:58: Maybe one less aspect about your first thing, especially in Germany.

00:24:02: there's also the saying if you're comparing yourself this is often start of being sad sometimes A problematic aspect that if you're looking to the left and right, To be other people.

00:24:14: And If your saying I wanted it top one percent or the top ten best performance of this stuff.

00:24:19: It means a constant comparison with others Isn't also problematic?

00:24:23: Yep!

00:24:24: Definitely yes Which is just so perfect for my next lesson.

00:24:28: actually It's like you set us up But yeah i mean its true.

00:24:35: This was one those things where To get the highest financial rewards, you're gonna have to be in a situation of comparison.

00:24:43: It's just true.

00:24:45: So people will be comparing you as a product two other two other competitors and You are hoping that they're going to be choosing you.

00:24:55: so whether your a gymnast Whether you know a podcaster is we described.

00:25:01: There is a competition aspect in almost every industry, especially an industry where you're looking for these peak levels of success.

00:25:08: If your restaurant they are comparing to other restaurants it's the reality and its struggle And I think obviously the ideal is that you compare yourself six months ago or last year You use as an iteration point.

00:25:27: Being number one in the world, which is sort of my next point doesn't necessarily bring happiness.

00:25:33: It brings financial success and those things don't necessarily come together.

00:25:41: What does this mean to you?

00:25:43: I see that as an important part on a journey or story-in life Which i think it's probably worth us jumping into Number two because its specifically what we want talk about.

00:25:57: So my number two for this is that life is a journey and there's no finish line.

00:26:05: There is no happy ever after, so you know... My point number one was all of the financial rewards come from becoming the very best in a particular niche or a particular industry where even being The Number One In Your Sales Office not necessarily No.

00:26:28: in the estate agent's office, number one is probably making dramatically more than three.

00:26:34: It scales down to every aspect but what I've seen with taking a lot of people to extreme success.

00:26:43: so in poker my clients have won publicly it over two hundred and fifty million dollars.

00:26:51: there are lots non-public winnings.

00:26:53: that happened as well.

00:26:56: companies, lots of people exit companies for hundreds of millions of dollars.

00:27:02: Olympic medalists world champions in different sports when we hit one of these peak events.

00:27:10: it doesn't solve all their problems

00:27:13: and

00:27:14: so many people feel that you know When I make everything's going to be okay right?

00:27:20: It is just natural.

00:27:21: So a big one.

00:27:22: i've worked with A lot of CEOs of Companies now founders Of companies And theirs Is the Exit.

00:27:28: When I exit for a hundred million dollars Then we'll be good and the truth is it's just another day And they have some more numbers in their bank account, and they've just lost their identity of Being the founder of a company.

00:27:44: They'd given out if sold at for money and The person who was chasing the gold medal had A really specific goal For maybe twenty years And that was the, I want to get a world record or I want To Get A gold medal at The Olympics.

00:28:01: So i wanted to get A championship belt and then They get the belts Or they get them at all?

00:28:08: Then it's now what Right.

00:28:11: so... I've sort of seen with clients a lot Of time feel like real work comes after extreme success.

00:28:22: We're looking for the client to have their exit.

00:28:24: So im helping them reach You get.

00:28:27: remove the self sabotage So they can have the exit that they believe will solve all of their problems and then They have time in this space to do the inner work To really enjoy the journey.

00:28:39: That Iran.

00:28:39: I was about to ask you whether as soon As they take out the self-subotage, as soon if they take a flashlight And make it like the inside shine Do they still need to be number one or isn't it gone?

00:28:54: In no way because there's sabotages.

00:28:56: let them to want this?

00:28:58: No, I think once you remove the sabotage.

00:29:01: it's just so much more natural for you to enjoy your work and outperform others.

00:29:09: So if you imagine... If say you're driving the accelerators on and the brakes are on And then you just removed a brake You don't necessarily decide to take off foot of accelerator or you can enjoy that ride Because all these tension resistance has gone.

00:29:22: It is like oh!

00:29:23: I could naturally go on social media Naturally, hire and fire the staff I should.

00:29:30: I can make a sales call like an ask for the investment money because CEOs it's often they don't want to reach out for investment until its too late Because he feels uncomfortable for them.

00:29:42: So these sorts of things when all this attention around those issues is gone Oftentimes their performance improves everything feel smooth Everything feels natural And as i say ideally That's the stage where we would like them to start enjoying their journey.

00:29:58: Because these are sort of, they're good days and this is a fun day.

00:30:01: And the flag in the ground, the liquidity event The gold medal Is just you know A landmark To look at on the way On your life.

00:30:17: It's

00:30:21: actually quite a kind of symptom rather than the destination you're aiming to.

00:30:25: So, that gold metal isn't... it is rather doing-the process of doing.

00:30:29: then the aspect?

00:30:31: Exactly!

00:30:33: The process of fulfilling your potential without resistance and in a state of flow will typically lead those moments of success but they usually come with some Negative feelings.

00:30:50: past that point of I've lost my identity.

00:30:52: What do i do next?

00:30:53: what Doi do now?

00:30:55: it often comes with feelings have guilt.

00:30:57: so You made a hundred million dollars and Now you desperately want your friends in family to be wealthy Because this is hard enough for you to communicate with them the same way.

00:31:10: So oftentimes, A big mistake I see founders make after liquidity event Is they start trying to invest in their friend's companies.

00:31:18: So all their friends come to them with an idea, hey I've got my day for a business.

00:31:22: All i need is five hundred thousand dollars and you just made one hundred million.

00:31:26: And not only do they nearly always end up losing all of the money that They put into these businesses.

00:31:32: like nearly Always The money gets lost.

00:31:36: it also damages the friendship.

00:31:37: and have seen That mistake over-and-over in now as if with clients ever pretty A strong conversation with them of like no investing anything for six months.

00:31:49: You do not need to worry about inflation.

00:31:52: Over like you just made a hundred million dollars, yes there's inflation.

00:31:57: that doesn't mean you need to invest everything right away and get locked up And it certainly doesn't me new investing.

00:32:03: all of your friends companies have the cooling off period and decide what you want to do six months from now once The noise has gone down in the guilt around you being so successful as started to decrease

00:32:14: Interesting.

00:32:16: And now you said that life is a journey and there's no finish line.

00:32:19: Yeah, I was thinking about this metaphor because usually a journey has the destination.

00:32:24: your aiming to... You're going too right?

00:32:25: Well we've had the finish line as death!

00:32:30: There is a finish line That were all gonna face but theres'no finish line before that.

00:32:36: So.. But i was asking myself What's the goal of the journey then?

00:32:41: or in your perspective?

00:32:43: Maybe destination isn't the right word because you know, traveling is something different than the journey we're going through and life.

00:32:50: But maybe what I'm talking about like actually it sounds like purpose anyway that people need to find a purpose on that following their purpose doesn't end until death.

00:32:58: so i believe That my Purpose In Life Is To Become The Most Elliott Version Of Elliot the most authentic version of me And that's it.

00:33:10: Whatever you end up choosing as your modality for that, is just a journey of becoming an authentic self.

00:33:18: So in my case I'm doing this through the journey of coaching.

00:33:22: You're going to face resistances and emotional challenges The smoother and more enjoyable that journey will be.

00:33:43: And then I think part of the journey for most people when it comes to satisfaction is giving back, helping others.

00:33:52: So...the route i see from almost everyone who has these levels of success Is they focus on personal success They reach their own.

00:34:07: It doesn't solve all of their problems.

00:34:09: They focus on the inner work, they then decide that helping others will make them feel satisfied... ...they do some level of mentoring… Helping people have success and get more satisfaction from helping other than having their own success.

00:34:25: Why is this so?

00:34:26: I think one part of it proves you weren't just lucky.

00:34:31: So if you've created a blueprint for success And can help other follow same blueprint And you can give them the help that you wish you had on a journey.

00:34:41: It's very fulfilling and they ego does enjoy it, but I do also believe we're community-based creatures.

00:34:49: We like to have value.

00:35:05: changing someone's life feels very tangible and it feels very real.

00:35:11: And I think that is where a lot of satisfaction comes from in people's lives.

00:35:17: Maybe you also have an answer about the question, i'm asking myself all the time... ...and this is about the purpose of growth because I witness for my self or what I realize is.. ..that always strive to grow not financially but humanly, emotionally when it comes to knowledge.

00:35:35: When it comes you know getting input all that stuff.

00:35:38: and I was once talking my singing teacher he said like trees also everything in nature grows.

00:35:43: It's about growth.

00:35:45: And i'm asking myself still why.

00:35:47: because as we say these successes are just side notes milestones.

00:35:51: You reach left & right.

00:35:53: so what is the journey then?

00:35:55: I think again its finding your most authentic self.

00:36:00: And once you're in that lane, the growth is inevitable.

00:36:04: So the tree that has the water source and the sunshine it just grows!

00:36:16: the financial success, the business success.

00:36:22: The number of friends that you have your social everything will just grow naturally if you're in that state and if you are in a stator flow.

00:36:31: And If You Are Not then You Won't Grow!

00:36:32: If Your In The Wrong Place... If You Doing The Wrong Things Then You Won'T Grow In Any Of Those Forms.

00:36:39: So I Think That The Growth Is The Natural Result Of Being Your Authentic Self or living in Kaichou.

00:36:50: I can remember, once talking to a woman she is practicing traditional Chinese medicine and was asking me what were you meant to be?

00:37:01: Like how where are your parents?

00:37:04: stepped-in before society step-in Before the schooling system steps-in all this stuff.

00:37:08: because basically happens You're formed anyway.

00:37:12: And she said something really interesting.

00:37:13: She said quite often it takes people until their thirties of forties to kind of restart, you know come to that level where they started and then challenge themselves or follow the path as we just said.

00:37:27: You called it finding your most authentic self?

00:37:29: Yeah!

00:37:30: And I'm asking myself what is YOUR way of finding your Most Authentic Self

00:37:35: for me?

00:37:37: For me its anywhere.

00:37:38: i start to feel a physical sensation thats holding back my resistance I don't know.

00:37:48: Yeah, like if it was uncomfortable making a sales call or maybe... If iwasuncomfortable coming on the podcast?

00:37:56: I mean years ago we used to be very uncomfortable doing podcasts so i used-if i had this book in the calendar you know my first year or two of.. In this industry they'd feel it in my stomach and feel attention and stress.

00:38:09: And then there's some fear that is holding me back from being ableto do whati want.

00:38:15: I would go and see a hypnotherapist because that's the modality.

00:38:19: I enjoy what i think is useful, And work on my own subconscious of letting go off those pieces of myself That are holding me back sort of the irrational fears... ...and I do an awful lot of self-work with different coaches Different modalities to try really dig into.

00:38:37: Where am I holding myself back?

00:38:38: where Am I not speaking My truth you know, what's the thing that I wish I had said this week?

00:38:44: That I wasn't able to say.

00:38:47: And I see that as the entry point for all of work for me to do and... ...I believe that this is unending work for life!

00:38:56: I don't think we ever get there.

00:38:58: We just have a target that were moving towards.

00:39:02: A graphic that i'll use when give talks Is if imagine square or cube becoming sphere And the different stages, so let's say seven different stages of a cube becoming as fear.

00:39:17: This is that way I view this kind of internal work.

00:39:22: So someone who's extraordinarily struggling, they're in depression and drug addiction.

00:39:28: They are like a cube...they just can't move.

00:39:31: Then we all try to become the sphere where you tap it and it just flows.

00:39:35: It just moves..it just rolls on this graphic.

00:39:41: And you know, a trauma therapist is working with the cubes trying to get them rolling a little bit and I'm working with people who are like one off-the-sphere trynna file down their little edges... ...to help them become completely smooth, completely circle.

00:39:59: Yeah!

00:39:59: And.. ..I just sort of think we always have more polishing to do.

00:40:04: there's something that we can find but never quite reach it.

00:40:07: We're just looking to get as smooth as possible and remove as much of our learned fears, learn anxieties, insecurities.

00:40:14: And sort of get them down to zero so we can be in the world as we most believe we

00:40:20: should.".

00:40:21: So your work is actually quite late on the journey towards failure?

00:40:26: Very very late!

00:40:27: I am helping people who have already seen everyone else... Usually they've had a coach They've been doing mindset work They're coming to me as a, I'm doing extraordinarily well but there's still something that can't quite explain and i know if could overcome this thing.

00:40:49: Then it would reach the top And thats the piece of work on or sometimes will now have people reached out where its.

00:40:56: Hey!

00:40:56: I've had the liquidity event and heard you want a podcast say that wouldn't be happy and im not happy.

00:41:03: Can You Help Me?

00:41:05: Can you help me now?

00:41:06: You know, I'm not looking for the performance and success.

00:41:14: in doing it for myself.

00:41:36: Does this also make you lonely, In a way?

00:41:38: Because what I witness is... ...I do not see that many people in my surrounding That work as hard on themselves As i do Which where I don't mean to judge them anyway.

00:41:48: But just the inner-work I'm investing Brings me On level.

00:41:52: conversations differ.

00:41:56: It's definitely true.

00:41:57: This Is isolation at The top.

00:42:01: And What will be is I will travel the country to go to meetup events with people who are more similar to me.

00:42:11: So, i'm a member of high-level masterminds that spend tens of thousands of dollars a year... ...to be in rooms of people who will understand what i'm talking about.

00:42:19: and one situation you have to be aware of it.. ..is if your doing all this self work or interested in this selfwork there's conversations you want to have.

00:42:29: You need find way.

00:42:31: put yourself into those rooms.

00:42:33: Otherwise you will be lonely, but there's no need to be lonely.

00:42:36: You just need to make the investment of money and time to do those things.

00:42:40: Yeah I mean it is the same right?

00:42:41: If your the smartest person in a room...you are on the wrong road.

00:42:45: yeah And i mean..and you're gonna pay to be in that room But its going to be expensive To get into that room and you have to accept That theres cost-of entry Time wise & Money wise & travel wise.

00:42:57: But if you say hey but im just lonely Because In my village in England, there aren't lots of people like me.

00:43:05: It's like yeah you have to leave the village!

00:43:10: These people exist but they're not going to exist in your village.

00:43:14: Is there a average amount of hypnosis it needs?

00:43:21: To get over that point you just mentioned?

00:43:23: I

00:43:24: mean...it varies from person-to-person and again its infinite.

00:43:31: So the very big resistant issues, it may only take a few sessions to get over their fear of failure.

00:43:39: The large self-sabotage.

00:43:41: but then someone might work with me for ten years on the fine tuning doing the work in the way that I'm doing with myself and just see it as hey i'm getting a return on investment from this?

00:43:52: And I see this is a lifelong journey of self improvement.

00:43:55: So oftentimes we see sort of the very traumatic work covered in the first five or ten sessions that then fine-tuning can go on for as long as someone wants to.

00:44:07: It's a bit like personal trainer, you know when are you fit?

00:44:15: And they might help you if your obese and just struggling.

00:44:19: it might be that first year working with a personal trainer who gets And you might decide to work with them for ten years, because now want become an ultramarathon runner.

00:44:30: Well, I can take over myself now as a habit and fit in healthy but not in

00:44:36: crisis.".

00:44:38: Awesome!

00:44:39: So far we had two things... Now comes the third?

00:44:44: Okay network is everything which again that direction of this interview just been talking about networking.

00:44:52: next That's the next one.

00:44:56: I really feel that focusing on your network and people around you changes the quality of your life dramatically in terms of success, but also in terms just enjoying our day-to-day comforting for people.

00:45:25: So like you were describing, if you're really doing a lot of self-work... If you go to a pub in London and you are doing a tonne of self work And do want talk with the people about all your self works You will not have very many interesting conversations.. ..and you won't be understood!

00:45:46: When you re into particular industry The people who are at the top in that industry, they know all of those surprises.

00:45:54: They know all if the pitfalls... ...they can help you through... ...the difficulties that your gonna face and see as you progress through the industry And then speed things up to such a dramatic amount.

00:46:08: So one thing I did when i learned hypnotherapy.

00:46:12: This is such a big life hack for any industry.

00:46:16: so this probably tip of podcast today.

00:46:20: I went and got qualified in hypnotherapy, And i would read books on Hypnotherapy.

00:46:26: And...I thought okay if I like a book.. ..i'm gonna reach out to the author & see if can hire them for one-to-one lessons!

00:46:35: A good number of authors came back & they did lessons with me.

00:46:40: It wasn't that expensive.

00:46:42: I managed get so many years of knowledge from bothering to reach out to authors of books in a niche industry.

00:46:51: And it was just such an incredible life hack.

00:46:54: and that's network, you know they're not my friends but then now... They are in the network now because I've reached them communicating early on with career I could ask questions and get them answered and avoid some pitfalls.

00:47:09: so i can understand some nuance about what work is doing.

00:47:14: That was a turbocharger for my professionalism, from my understanding of the topic.

00:47:22: And I think this works for almost anything.

00:47:24: so if you can find a way to speak to the best You can save yourself So many years of effort

00:47:32: and that's an excellent shortcut.

00:47:34: I mean as we said you avoid the pitfalls The quick routes.

00:47:39: they look at your strengths and weaknesses And they witnessed it for quite a few years.

00:47:46: what happens in this industry, so yeah totally makes sense.

00:47:50: So I really think again.

00:47:52: one of the things you were mentioning earlier is if you're not public about your success and what you are doing does that hold back to these talented people get stuck?

00:48:06: You don't find out your talent level until you have a network of high performers in the particular industry that you're working within, because then you'll getting feedback from others who know.

00:48:17: So if I take it to...I've worked with a lot UFC fighters over these and If you want to get into the UFC?

00:48:27: You have to be training at a gym With ufc fighters.

00:48:31: That's really how it works Because you need to be sparring with people At that level to understand where you really stand, and you will be forced either get that level or discover not capable of it.

00:48:45: If go the local karate school in Paris... You'll never fight at the UFC!

00:48:52: And if you do randomly get lucky then you're gonna get destroyed because your'e no use for competition and don't know what you need to know.

00:49:04: So your network not only does it sort of open doors, but it also challenges you in ways that allow you to judge where your performance is really at and see the gaps in your performance.

00:49:17: And push forward.

00:49:18: so obviously from a social side The Network Is so important In terms Of happiness in life But Also in Terms of Whatever Your Interests Are or Businesses.

00:49:28: I think It's An Unlock That Without The Network Its Just Extraordinarily Difficult to reach high levels of success.

00:49:36: So, actually your thing shouldn't be network is everything but curated networks?

00:49:41: Curated

00:49:42: right?

00:49:42: yeah.

00:49:42: that's I think a much better way of describing it very curated at work.

00:49:48: and what does it look like to invest into a network?

00:49:52: because usually you know there's this aspect of having worked together off knowing each other or going a certain way together whatever.

00:50:02: But then there's also the aspect of giving and taking, right?

00:50:05: So investing in a network at least as far I can understand it.

00:50:09: Also means helping other people.

00:50:11: And you just said everyone loves to help other people.

00:50:15: What does your what do your investments look like when it comes to networking?

00:50:18: so being extraordinarily generous and helpful and putting us off into places again sort of linked my story at the beginning of my career, that there was a niche available in the poker market.

00:50:36: The poker players if they could work on their mindset with hypnotherapy would win a lot more money.

00:50:41: and I wasn't a poker player but just had friends in industry.

00:50:47: so i went to poker forums every single day offering free mindset advice.

00:50:55: You know, I had the qualifications to be able to help even though i wasn't a poker player.

00:51:01: The self-sabotage fear of failure for success anxiety issues that could help with those.

00:51:06: so by giving them started building network in the poker industry because it was there see you have put yourself into location on the net work they want to build.

00:51:15: I was interested in MMA but in my teens and twenties.

00:51:21: So when joined an MMA Club where there were lots of professional fighters and the guy running the club ran, The big event in the UK.

00:51:32: And I was surrounded by the top professional fighters in the U.K at that time because i put myself in that environment In business now...I really enjoy self-development.

00:51:44: so I look for groups Where I believe There will be a lot Of people interested in self development..and I join the group.

00:51:50: So then fly around the country to make sure that I'm in those groups and i'm having these conversations.

00:51:55: And, um trying to give value so they don't feel like i am a vampire on this group.

00:52:00: instead of the offer value when service one because it's fun its much more fun.

00:52:06: helping people and offering others is not completely altruistic.

00:52:09: enjoy offering value and service but thats how you build your network as put yourself where other people are an then give us matches.

00:52:18: you possibly can see how things play out.

00:52:22: Sometimes people will take advantage of you and that's fine.

00:52:25: That's part the process And sometimes you'll make lifelong friendships and connections with people who are going to be valuable for You, and you're gonna be valuable For them.

00:52:35: Do if any advice?

00:52:36: I mean what did just said.

00:52:37: i was thinking about artists.

00:52:39: i'm interested in artistry so If i'm into movies i would guess i need To go to los angeles.

00:52:46: if i'm Into music i would need to Go to nashville but as soon As they have kids and a family turns out to be rather difficult, so there are certain limitations sometimes in life.

00:52:59: What's your advice on dealing with these limitations?

00:53:03: You have to be realistic about what you're able to do.

00:53:07: In the same way.

00:53:08: I'm no and forty-four years old... ...I am not going to be a professional athlete And it doesn't matter how much i want To Be One.

00:53:15: It Doesn't Matter If I go and train at The Olympic Training Centre.

00:53:19: I'm Not Going To Be An Olympic Gold Medalist Anything And in the same and other industries, sometimes we miss our spot.

00:53:27: It's just true that we've aged out... ...and there is something you have to accept.

00:53:33: There aren't many fifty-five year olds who become famous rock stars.

00:53:39: You probably missed it.

00:53:41: That's a reality of life.

00:53:43: We need to fit around those realities.

00:53:46: But if your a fifty years old and want enjoy music Hopefully, you're in a position where you could hire a very high level coach to teach your guitar.

00:53:57: You might be able go gigs that you couldn't afford to go too... ...you may find the location of musicians who want to share and want to teach.

00:54:06: but we have to be realistic.

00:54:08: it's unlikely on stage in front of fifty thousand people And I think some acceptance from different stages offer us different opportunities and we just have to accept that's reality.

00:54:21: And we can't fight against it, you know?

00:54:23: We're living in reality... ...and were all gonna die.. ..we are going to have a different phase of life where things are possible.

00:54:32: So I had make the most what is available for each age rather than wishing was twenty years younger!

00:54:40: Yeah thats true but still i mean its not impossible.

00:54:44: I'm still trying to get this.

00:54:47: But again, it's what are we looking for?

00:54:50: Are we looking to disprove reality or setting ourselves up for an extraordinarily difficult ride when there are other ways... Again, For me is about becoming the most authentic self?

00:55:03: does The Most Authentic Self at fifty five really need To Become a Rockstar?

00:55:08: What Is That Really About?

00:55:10: Or Do They Enjoy Sharing Music?

00:55:12: And There Would Be quite enjoy playing music at a local bar in front of one hundred people, which is very realistic.

00:55:18: So it's this case that you know, Is It About Sharing or Is It about Attention?

00:55:23: And if it was about attention as there some work to do they're regarding You Know Some Some Issues That Haven't Been Resolved.

00:55:32: I see so but its also just Just A Symptom.

00:55:36: The Big Stage With The Fifty Thousand People Isn'T About the Stage?

00:55:39: But There'S Some Kind Of Some Lack Or Something.

00:55:42: Am I enough?

00:55:43: This would prove that i'm enough.

00:55:46: It's usually that kind of, but if it's about sharing a musical skill... ...it doesn't matter if there are ten people there.

00:55:52: If you're enjoying sharing your talent

00:55:55: Interesting Let's go to number four.

00:55:58: Number Four Okay so this is close and network as well And doing the right thing wins overall I believe in every way.

00:56:11: So, so many clients come to me with a frustration that they see immoral people having high levels of success.

00:56:22: So the person who ripped them off in a deal or the person whose stole from a business partner?

00:56:30: Or The Person Who Lied About What They're Offering A Client And They Missed Out On The Sale and This Competitor Who Lies Got The Sale.

00:56:41: They have a lot of frustration about seeing that they were doing the right thing and this other person's doing the wrong thing.

00:56:46: And, they've been rewarded for doing The Wrong Thing.

00:56:48: This is unfair!

00:56:50: The longer I'm being in business... ...the more i've seen your reputation Your generosity Just pay off again over long periods.

00:57:08: So one you feel Morally congruent.

00:57:12: So if someone's been stealing from people, they're carrying the weight of stealing from People.

00:57:17: They know what they've done and it's not a nice way of living.

00:57:22: so If you feel that you've been trading with people in a clean way in a good way You'll feeling good about yourself.

00:57:29: life is smoother anyway.

00:57:31: But then also when it comes to business The person who has done the right thing over-and-over gets offered better deals.

00:57:39: they get invited to the meal, to the networking event.

00:57:43: They get invited into their wedding and all of these sorts of things.

00:57:47: where this builds over years.

00:57:50: in a year's an I'll have clients reaching out now who you know, right?

00:57:54: I haven't spoken with them in twelve years when he sent me a referral that I have those sorts of moments standout And i think yeah This is because was always choosing to end any relationship And sort of not try and get max value.

00:58:11: I think getting max value in the short term is, it's not who i want to be.

00:58:17: so that's Not The Most Authentic Version Of Me.

00:58:19: You Know Start Off.

00:58:20: I Have No Interest In Getting The Max Value On The Short Term But I Believe In The Long Term.

00:58:25: you Actually Get More Value From Everything By Over-And-Over Doing The Right Thing And Being Known For Doing The right Thing And Not Trying To Take Advantage Of People.

00:58:36: So You know, if you see someone stealing and getting away with it feels sorry for them because they're burning their relationships.

00:58:44: They are burning value rather than feel jealous of that attitude.

00:58:49: Yeah!

00:58:49: Feel bad for the way that they live in life... The guilt is going to have.

00:58:53: carry on then all opportunity & relationship they burn trying get a little bit money up front.

00:59:02: that there was a really nice quote I was told from my business friend and she is the yoga teacher.

00:59:07: The yoga teachers said, ''The good travels

00:59:09: slow.''.

00:59:10: And it's just what you've said... You're looking to the left, look into your right and feel like people are crossing or passing you in a way by being rude,... ...by being egoistic.... By being bad.. What is going wrong here?

00:59:24: Then exactly what you have just said, the aspect of the Yoga Teacher wanted us say was okay.

00:59:30: in short term It may make you more successful on certain levels, money or career whatever it is.

00:59:37: But in the long term its being good.

00:59:40: that brings your father so the good travels slower.

00:59:45: I really liked that image

00:59:47: and i just seen over-and-over And again II get to glance into The lives of huge numbers are successful people.

00:59:59: So I'm not just basing this on my personal life experience.

01:00:03: You know, I've worked with hundreds of extremely successful people over the years and i've seen what has brought them success And a lot of the time they have been treating people well!

01:00:14: They do have these long term relationships in their lives.

01:00:19: so yeah...I think it's an easier way to live and you just have to accept that sometimes someone will jump ahead....they'll push in line.

01:00:29: You know, they're just pushing in line by taking that short cut.

01:00:32: But the rest of the people on the line... They no longer like who pushed him from and will have an impact on them.

01:00:41: five years or ten years to twenty years.

01:00:43: but you don't need to feel jealous about person who pushed online.

01:00:49: There's also one aspect I'm still thinking off is being number-one doesn't mean it brings happiness?

01:00:56: Yes, that's true.

01:00:56: And you just said some of the most successful people in the world or quite a few people are quite successful.

01:01:03: how does it come?

01:01:04: success and happiness so often do not go hand-in-hand?

01:01:08: Because as I was saying i think its next part on journey which brings satisfaction.

01:01:14: So lot of people stuck to be happy when reach this level of success.

01:01:20: then they're stuck until reached the level of sucess.

01:01:23: I will be happy when i have my hundred million dollar exit.

01:01:26: So they're holding back happiness on their journey and then, They Have the Exit And Then It Doesn't Make Them Happy.

01:01:33: so now I've got some numbers in My bank account...I was happy for five days but it didn't solve everything..and as I said is this deeper work accepting The Journey Continues and Helping Others That Tends To Bring The Satisfaction The high levels of success give you the space and resources for you to then help others enjoy your life, feel satisfied.

01:01:58: Is it also a self-fulfilling prophecy?

01:02:01: If these people strive or something this big thing on the horizon they're aiming at... And is actually what keeps them back from being happy?

01:02:09: Or are there necessary parts in their journey?

01:02:12: I think that's part.

01:02:15: I think it's a lesson you have to, people listening to this podcast.

01:02:19: Uh-I can say this over and over again most People will still believe when they have their hundred million dollar exit They're gonna be happy And It Will Only Be On The Day That They Have It!

01:02:30: And then like oh i remember that podcast?

01:02:32: I heard ten years ago Yeah the guy was right...i'm not happy..and Again You'll Feel Happy That You Succeeded In Your Goal And There'l Be A Short Term Happiness But There'S Not A. L-You're Not Now Happy For The Rest Of Your Life.

01:02:44: It's just a moment.

01:02:46: Say again, fun view on the journey is beautiful mountain view but you're going to pass it and there will be more turbulence But it does give you this space To then really do that inner work And focus on what would make your authentically happy?

01:03:05: I think That why I still push people towards these high levels of success Pushed people toward the high performance because that then gives you the opportunity to really live your life in a way where you can live it.

01:03:21: In a way, if you lived at nine-to-five jobs and always questioned what would have happened had I tried... It's very hard to be satisfied when you were wondering about having taken this risk?

01:03:33: Yeah!

01:03:33: And also sounds like totally different understanding of freedom Because usually people tend ask for money or try to get rich.

01:03:44: knowing what you're in a compass looks like your purpose is, or the flow state.

01:03:49: You just mentioned it's totally different way of being free

01:03:53: and The musician who loves to play music.

01:03:57: And they are in a flow-state.

01:03:59: They don't need much money Therein their flow-state all day living there authentic self again.

01:04:05: people Don't have to become the best in world.

01:04:07: I'm saying that most money Is there?

01:04:11: In your flow stay and enjoying life then you're winning life anyway, but all I'm saying is the financial rewards are in that top level of performance.

01:04:22: Awesome!

01:04:22: If i counted correctly.

01:04:24: one more thing it's missing?

01:04:26: Yes so the final one would say to me at twenty or any twenty year old... Is there no rush for you find what you need and want to be And this supposed a decade of failure?

01:04:43: There is no rush for you and trying

01:04:45: new things.

01:04:46: Let's go through this again slowly, there's no rush to?

01:04:50: To really find what your supposed be in life.

01:04:54: So so many people that you speak too early twenties feel like time running out.

01:05:00: Yeah And they have it figured by thirty At forty four.

01:05:07: now I can say twenty years really young.

01:05:11: You've been an adult two years And you know, hopefully.

01:05:16: You're going to be an adult for at least another sixty years.

01:05:20: so your tiny percentage of how much of an adult have been and

01:05:28: yeah I was just thinking off a. that's why i'm smiling.

01:05:30: it Was Just Thinking Off A Conversation I Just Recently Had.

01:05:33: There Is A Big Podcast Here In Germany.

01:05:35: When I Was Starting This Podcast He Was Picking Up The Topic in His Podcasts And Was Talking About It With.

01:05:40: A Guest Of Mine was also a very famous podcaster here in Germany.

01:05:43: And they were talking about these aspects of, okay what would be the suggestions you have given your twenty year old self?

01:05:51: The podcasting guy said I actually quite happy when i just recently read through this stuff that I wrote when I was twenty or nineteen years old and felt really comfortable with it!

01:06:01: When listening to his conversation he was totally overwhelmed... Just two weeks ago so we talked.

01:06:08: I was totally confused about this.

01:06:12: being said, because... ...I sometimes feel embarrassed whenever i read stuff from last year.

01:06:18: And that makes me totally happy!

01:06:20: Because then when you see my growth path.... Okay.. ..i felt embarrassed for what i wrote in the past years.

01:06:25: This year it would look much

01:06:27: better!!

01:06:28: How do we manage to get all of these things?

01:06:31: He explained a story to us and it's slightly different but... ...this is just what came into our mind.

01:06:35: That growth actually accelerates in some ways.

01:06:38: I just think it's such a sticking point in your twenties.

01:06:41: But you're just, that's the strong sticking point where thirty is such a big deal to so many people

01:06:47: and forty feels like being close to dying already.

01:06:52: And yeah!

01:06:53: The reality most... Most of them have their business success in their fifties.

01:07:01: Typically That's when the largest amount of success comes back.

01:07:07: I believe that's because of the network that you've built over your twenties, thirties and forties.

01:07:15: And then you're in a position to... You know?

01:07:18: Your friends are more successful.

01:07:20: they can give you the opportunities They want to give you there.

01:07:23: everyone has grown up together In all these things.

01:07:27: Yeah The sort of rush into your twenties To have everything perfect and try and compete with people on Instagram who doing well at their age It is just not realistic.

01:07:37: so enjoy your twenties, fail an awful lot.

01:07:42: Learn lots and lots of lessons about

01:07:44: yourself.".

01:07:45: And if you find your purpose when you're forty?

01:07:48: You done great!

01:07:50: It's very kind of heck... ...you could recommend to find yourselves in a purpose or you are in a server as well.

01:07:56: Try lots of things try lots of thing and fail.

01:07:59: lots like make some good guesses take risk.

01:08:04: there is usually not much to lose in your twenties so Most people don't already have kids or a family, so you can take these large risks.

01:08:12: You can live in different

01:08:13: cities.".

01:08:15: I mean this is actually one big recommendation for anyone of their twenties... ...is leave your hometown.

01:08:26: It's SO important to see other versions of life and get away from the narratives that people around you.

01:08:37: So if you're in your high school town and you going out in the evenings, then you meeting people who view you a certain way.

01:08:44: It can be very hard to break into it an upgrade in an evolved version of yourself If everyone around you is viewing you as a certain type of person?

01:08:54: If you move to a major city where nobody knows you You have a chance to find out who you are without the judgments of those around you Who.

01:09:03: I would recommend anyone in suburbia Go get yourself to a major city, even if it's only for six months.

01:09:10: But make sure that you create some space from the judgments and the views of those around your house And see who end up being with this place?

01:09:23: Finally enough I did just the other way round.

01:09:25: i moved from big cities into small one.

01:09:27: The story was... you know, looked out one of the different universities here in the country and said look this one is like a district away.

01:09:37: It takes half an hour travel from Berlin.

01:09:39: should try it out.

01:09:40: I said okay so i fillout the application stuff send it in and wanted to go to Berlin anyway through university there but just had problem that they didn't take me into first place.

01:09:49: And then I say ok let's goto.

01:09:50: another one realized oh!

01:09:52: its not half-an-hour way...its three hours away which means..I definitely need to move.

01:09:57: And it was paradise.

01:09:58: It wasn't just the way you mentioned and described, but whole different surrounding completely different relationships with people there.

01:10:06: There's cultural aspects in all that stuff.

01:10:10: so...

01:10:11: It has to be fresh or new?

01:10:14: Has this breakaway from what we knew again I think the break away of family friends who grew up with.

01:10:22: I believe twenties is decade.

01:10:25: Yeah, the flexibility and mobility of your life is highest in this.

01:10:30: That's something I would have loved to know as well that you're the most flexible person you'll ever be.

01:10:36: It doesn't get easier!

01:10:39: Awesome!

01:10:40: Elliot Rowe number one all value comes from being top-one percent in industry.

01:10:49: Number two Life is a journey with no finish line.

01:10:54: Curated network is everything.

01:10:56: Number four, doing the right thing wins overall.

01:10:59: and number five there's no rush for you to really find out who are in life.

01:11:03: That's lovely!

01:11:04: Yeah thankyou It was fun to dig into as well.

01:11:07: so I enjoyed this project.

01:11:09: Thank

01:11:09: a lot that it was very enjoyable.

01:11:11: Yes i appreciate it.

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01:12:13: So have some time!

01:12:15: Just like for visiting our social media channels to keep updates and excessive content.

01:12:22: You can find links in the show notes.

01:12:36: We are looking forward to reading your suggestions and feedback on future topics and guests.

01:12:44: So, and now let's listen to our podcast.

01:12:51: Until next time!

01:12:52: Stay inspired and curious!

01:12:56: Your Joel.